As we are all aware, bullying comes in many forms from, verbal, physical, emotional, mental, to non-verbal threats, and body postures and now, with the age of the internet, we have cyberbulling that has proven to be just as dangerous and devastating as any other type. What many people are not aware of is that a bully has many faces meaning, anyone can be a bully and you may not even know it until you come across one. And, when you do, you undoubtedly know it! For children, we as parents are, hopefully, quick to listen and, quick to respond. Bullying can be a devastating, demeaning, and life altering traumatic event for the victim. Ask any bully who has come out of the closet as to why they did it and, ultimately, how they know they made their victim feel. For others, they turn into lifetime bullies who end up in the workplace and continue their bullying behavior.
Yes, grown adults being bullied in the workplace can be just as devastating, demeaning, demoralizing and, life altering. The only difference is, there is no mom or dad to run to who can step in and stand up. For the bullied adult, this is their livelihood and that of their family's and, more than likely, should they speak up, it could, ultimately, cost them their job.
So, what are the behaviors of a bully? For the child bully, it is any behavior that is threatening, intimidating or, behavior that makes another feel fearful for themselves or their possessions. A bully will use their size to control, manipulate or harass another. A bully will use their status to do the same. A bully will be a bully just because they can! Bullies seek out their victims based on what they view as a weakness. The same goes for adult bullies and both can be just as dangerous. Imagine, if you will, the cyber bully who spends their time taunting an individual on the internet, harassing, stalking only to insult and degrade, spread vicious rumors only with the intent to hurt another. This can be an adult or a child. Now, imagine being in the workplace where you have a superior who is a bully and uses either their status and/or position to back up their behavior. This can be anything from going against company policy, allowing others le-way but not the victim, consistent write-ups, getting in the way of promotions and/or increases in pay, or, if the behavior is brought to the attention of superiors by way of a complaint, they may lie about said behavior and either make it even more difficult for you to perform your job or, you could ultimately lose said job. Either way, the victim needs to have the proper tools in order to learn how to deal with bullying behavior no matter the situation.
My personal view is a 'No bullying allowed in any way, shape, or form' stance and I advocate this for both children and adults. For the parent, it is your responsibility to be there for your child to instill the self-esteem, assertiveness, and self-respect so that your child will know how to carry themselves in order not to be prey for a bully. There are tools for both children and adults that can be utilized to fight back in the many faces of the bully! For more help with this, please visit my website: www.wix.com/mmmcconnell/Live-Life-Coaching
Do Not Be A Victim!
Yes, grown adults being bullied in the workplace can be just as devastating, demeaning, demoralizing and, life altering. The only difference is, there is no mom or dad to run to who can step in and stand up. For the bullied adult, this is their livelihood and that of their family's and, more than likely, should they speak up, it could, ultimately, cost them their job.
So, what are the behaviors of a bully? For the child bully, it is any behavior that is threatening, intimidating or, behavior that makes another feel fearful for themselves or their possessions. A bully will use their size to control, manipulate or harass another. A bully will use their status to do the same. A bully will be a bully just because they can! Bullies seek out their victims based on what they view as a weakness. The same goes for adult bullies and both can be just as dangerous. Imagine, if you will, the cyber bully who spends their time taunting an individual on the internet, harassing, stalking only to insult and degrade, spread vicious rumors only with the intent to hurt another. This can be an adult or a child. Now, imagine being in the workplace where you have a superior who is a bully and uses either their status and/or position to back up their behavior. This can be anything from going against company policy, allowing others le-way but not the victim, consistent write-ups, getting in the way of promotions and/or increases in pay, or, if the behavior is brought to the attention of superiors by way of a complaint, they may lie about said behavior and either make it even more difficult for you to perform your job or, you could ultimately lose said job. Either way, the victim needs to have the proper tools in order to learn how to deal with bullying behavior no matter the situation.
My personal view is a 'No bullying allowed in any way, shape, or form' stance and I advocate this for both children and adults. For the parent, it is your responsibility to be there for your child to instill the self-esteem, assertiveness, and self-respect so that your child will know how to carry themselves in order not to be prey for a bully. There are tools for both children and adults that can be utilized to fight back in the many faces of the bully! For more help with this, please visit my website: www.wix.com/mmmcconnell/Live-Life-Coaching
Do Not Be A Victim!